Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Relations!!

..I think the movie "In pursuit of happiness" should be given the credit of inspiring me to write this blog.. I mean all you ppl SHOULD watch this movie and if any body is a father then its a MUST WATCH kinds..

Father and son jodi is not usually the relation that is talked about or discussed moreoften historically.. Either its mother-son or father-daughter.. But then to think of it I think I love my father equally as i luv maa (I call my mum "maa").. I remember my relatives talking about this incident on my birth that my father saw me after 3 months since my maa was in Kerala and Daddy was in Abad and so when maa returned from delivery that's when Daddy saw me.. Those days no internet and no scanners so Daddy didn't even have a pic of me.. how sad for him poor guy.. but he has been this super calm chilled person since i remember..Perseverant, Hardworking,Workoholic,Focussed.. Maa always quarelled with him (Still does) on his nature of coming from office and then sitting like log in front of TV.. no outings,no picnics,no parties.. he likes solitude.. i hv inherited a little of it as sometimes i dont want anybody near me.. we tease him whenever he goes in his bedroom (which is like most of the times he's in there only) by saying that "raja apne darbaar me jaa rahe hai".. now even he has started saying himself "raja darbaar me jaa rahe hai to koi disturb mat karna" he he he.. Dad has only hit me once.. Maa used to hit me- i think daily ;-).. he intervened and in the end maa and dad quarelled.. he never believes in hitting and stuff.. he will give u "Advice" (sometimes they are so repetitive).. but then he himself proclaims that these are "Million dollar avice".. so u know we are always rich ;-)

My Uncle (Dad's elder bro) had once taken me aside and told me that u dare not disrespect your father as he is the person who has crossed all limits to accumulate money for our good upbringing.. He was a govt employee and after marriage left for a pvt firm for better salary.. he grew professionally there but my uncle said that he used to do extra work on sundays so that he can earn more..he is a solitude loving person coz he felt if he saved on his leisure may be my family will enjoy.. today when i look in retrospective I feel dad has done LOTS for us.. He took it as "His responsiblity".. the way Will Smith did in the movie for his son Christopher..

Here I am thinking abt my Christopher (Dev).. wat can I do to make him feel what i feel for my father.. Will i be a good dad? will i be a good teacher to him? will i be a good friend to him? How should i be to him? I mean its pointless thinking rite now but then y not think abt it.. Is this a feeling every father goes thru? or m i the odd one out? i guess as my friends too start having babies i can find out the answer.. back to father son discussion.. Dev has not started calling me PAPA and i feels so nice to hear it.. he will blabber then as if he has lot many things to complain wat his maa did to him the whole day.. I cant understand him but then his looks says that he's complaining.. i hope i understand him as he grows.. i hope we be good friends when he grows.. i hope he looks upto me the same way I look upto my Daddy.. I hope.. I hope the sentiments of mine pass onto him too..

Once again apologise for writing on similar topic but can't help (Luv dad and dev so much)

Cheers!

Monday, December 1, 2008

First Blog!!

Yup.. i couldn't resist all the accolades my friends and colleagues took whenever they mentioned abt their blog.. So here i m.. Made up my mind that i will be a regular blogger (Strong will power).. But then i realise that topics are not required.. So i m thinking that i will just write whatever i feel (Too boring eh?!) .. isn't that called blogging? (Duh!)

Look, i can be bad and i can be very bad at this.. i will try not to attain the superlative.. So chill and have courage and will power to read more ;)

Should I write on Mumbai Blasts? Naaah.. already the world is talking abt it, and as usual we(India) are playing politics over it... Just read that Major Unnikrishnan's father shouted at Kerala CM when the CM went to visit the deceased's parents.. He didnt even allow the sniffer dogs to enter his house (the dogs were supposed to sniff out some explosive devices planted at Major's residence meant to hurt the CM..Heights!!) and threatened that if any politician would visit him then he would commit suicide.. What does all this say? Is it anger? is it pain? is it helplessness? is it the way the father is showing his protest?

Hard to say but then how can we understand the pain of the father who lost his Young son.. I mean the valour and poshthomous accolades are of no importance to him.. He has "Lost" his son.. This pain is intolerable.. I heard my Dad say "Oh my God" when he heard of Major Unnikrishnan's death.. I asked him with my brows up, wat made him exclaim like that.. His reply was "The father has lost his young son.." The statement was enough.. I am a Son too.. I am a Father too.. Suddenly i could place myself in the father's shoes.. suddenly I could place myself in son's shoes too.. How scary it was.. I mean, the thought itself is scary and yes, this has made me realise why the Major's father behaved in this manner..

He chose the most decent way of not talking.. what would any father have done? hold press meetings, give statements that "My son died for the Country".. This brave father did nothing.. He just went into a shell where he could miss his son.. the child who grew in front of him.. the child for whom he saw many dreams.. the child who must have promised him many dreams in return of being such a great father.. He had lost it all.. The country might have lost a Brave and Valiant soldier, but this man lost his dreams, his reason of staying alive.. He lost his Son God damn it.. And rite now I am able to go through the pain..

Thank God for being merciful and so kind on me and I pray to give immense strenght to all those who have lost their near and dear ones in whatever way..

Parting is pain, but parting from near and dear ones is Hell.. Trust me, it is..

Luv u Papa.. Luv u Dev